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Graf Victor gravicx — Let me just say that I love the idea of this book. A girl who has suffered poverty, famine, loss, and abuse in 17th century Ireland winds up finding herself in the role of “scourge of the seven seas” and just when she thinks that she has it all made, she ends up dead and cursed to live out one hundred lifetimes as a dog. Sounds like a really terrific and original idea, right? Well, it is. It’s just not executed very well. This story feels rushed, bland, and forgettable. So I say five stars for the amazing idea, but two stars for the carrying out of that idea. I still think that A.S. King is a tremendously talented writer, and this book is by no means excruciatingly bad. But I would probably read Please Ignore Vera Dietz before this one, just so you know how good she can be. We catch up with this feisty girl in the 1980’s, where she’s a now a teenager named Saffron, born into a lower middle class family in the U.S. Some of the most entertaining and enjoyable parts of this book are found in the opening scenes, where Saffron is a wee mite of a preschooler with all the memories and experiences of a bloodthirsty pirate tucked away in her head. With all of the knowledge of a ruthless adult, plus one hundred canines, Saffron excels at school. Her parents’ greatest wish is that she will go to college and raise the status and wealth of her family, but she has no desire to follow that path. She remembers one night a few centuries ago when she lost the love of her life, and left behind a hoard of treasures. Now she’s determined to go back and reclaim what she lost. At just over two hundred pages, I think that this book is too short. I needed more time to know these characters and fill in all of the gaps in this story. Some elements I feel could have been trimmed to make way for more explanation and character building. For example, Saffron’s very inconsequential and brief relationship with a neighborhood boy who turns out to be a jerk. Why not cut that and include something more about Emer’s lost love? I also didn’t really feel like the “one hundred dog lifetimes” element was developed or linked to the story enough. The little doggie care tips do not feel connected to the story in any clear way (although I can see how a few of them are vaguely connected), and mainly just seem unnecessary. I love the whole idea, but I would have liked to see Saffron learn, grow, and mature from those one hundred canine lives. It really didn’t seem like she did. Many of the important story-driving scenes seem shoved in, and even nonsensical. For example, when Emer is revealed as a woman among a wounded group of sailors recovering from a battle with pirates, the Captain, unsure of what to do with her (can’t strand her, can’t keep her aboard), decides to give her an entire ship and some of his few remaining crewmen and set her up as the Captain with no strings attached. Seriously. Or when Emer decides to volunteer to go to Tortuga as a sort of mail order bride, but then is completely aghast to discover that the men there want to sleep with her. What did you think was going to happen?! Perfect Musical Pairing The Black Eyed Peas – I Gotta Feeling This book is a bit like a pop song. It’s catchy and flashy and so much fun on the front end. But then you get it stuck in your head and go on a listening marathon, about halfway through which you realize that this song is actually not fun or exciting. It’s extremely repetitive and the lyrics are complete shit.