Anders Klitgaard itibaren Boguszewiec, Poland

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11/21/2024

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Anders Klitgaard Kitabın yeniden yazılması (10)

2019-06-12 01:41

Goldilocs And The Three Bears TrendKitaplar Kütüphanesi

Tarafından yazılmış kitap Tarafından: Express

This is a really good book. It was slow to start, spending pages upon pages talking about the benefits of being happy. Like, duh, just wanting to be happy isn't a good enough reason? I want to be happier because, uh, I'll be happier? Other than that, good stuff, though. Concrete suggestions backed by psychological study. Summary: - Your past doesn't determine your future. Increase your gratitude. Forgive. - Assume bad things are temporary and isolated to the particular context in which they occur. Assume good things are permanent and pervade every area of your life. Dispute the bad thoughts as needed. - Enjoy pleasures that don't require a lot of effort--savor them and share them-- but more importantly seek out gratifications, things that require effort and produce a sense of accomplishment. - To make your job meaningful, find a way to use your signature strengths there. Things to remember How to forgive (p. 79): REACH -Recall the hurt as objectively as possible. Try to imagine how it went from the other person's perspective and what they might have been thinking or feeling, with the assumption that they are not evil. -Empathize: try to understand from the other person's point of view. Reasons people hurt others: they feel their survival is threatened; they're afraid, worried, or hurt themselves; something about the situation; carelessness. -Altruistically give forgiveness. Remember a time when someone forgave you. Rise above the hurt and vengeance. -Commit yourself to forgive and make a record of it, by writing the person a letter, writing in your diary, telling a friend, etc. -Hold onto forgiveness--every time you think of the hurt, remember that you have forgiven it. My signature strengths (VIA strengths survey quiz starting p. 140, also available on www.authentichappiness.org): appreciation of beauty, gratitude, optimism, playfulness, and fairness. Hm, why do I love yarn and feel my mind go numb whenever I walk into work? I wonder... "There are few stronger predictors of happiness than a close, nurturing, equitable, intimate, lifelong companionship with one's best friend." (p.187) Well, duh, when you put it that way... 90% accurate predictors of divorce (p. 197): - a harsh startup in a disagreement - criticism of partner, rather than complaints - displays of contempt - hair-trigger defensiveness - lack of validation (particularly stonewalling) - negative body language happy and improving couples (p. 197): - find out each other's plans for the day before parting in the morning - have a low-stress reunion conversation at the end of each work day - demonstrate lots of affection, laced with tenderness and forgiveness - go out on a date once a week - exchange genuine affection and appreciation at least once a day p.199 The more inaccurately idealized the people saw their partners, the more stable the relationship. ??? I find this one hard to believe--sounds great until it wears off. p. 262 good life--using your signature strengths to obtain abundant gratification in the main realms of your life meaningful life--using your signatures strengths and virtues in the service of somehing much larger than yourself full life--experiencing positive emotions about the past and future, savoring positive feelings from teh pleasures, deriving abundant gratification from your signature strengths, adn using these strengths in the service of something larger to obtain meaning.

Okuyucu Anders Klitgaard itibaren Boguszewiec, Poland

Kullanıcı, bu kitapları portalın yayın kurulu olan 2017-2018'de en ilginç olarak değerlendirdi "TrendKitaplar Kütüphanesi" Tüm okuyucuların bu literatürü tanımalarını tavsiye eder.