Mürebbiye-Türk Edebiyat Klasikleri 2 - Hüseyin Rahmi Gürpınar ücretsiz kitap indir

Manuela Montoya manuelamhdesign — As a parent of a toddler and the husband of an Asian, I was very curious about this book. I've heard lots of uproar from American parents about how critical Chua is of Western parenting. As I read the book, however, I found myself agreeing with her more than I disagreed with her. As a teacher, I've had hundreds of parent/teacher conferences and seeing (over and over again) the way American parents speak to their kids, it's hard not to agree with Chua that Western parents give too much independence to their children. I've seen so many weenie parents (a Fred Jones term) say things to their kids like [imagine the weeniest voice ever], "Johnny, if you maybe have time when you come home from school--after you have a snack and watch TV for an hour--do you think maybe, if you're not too tired, that you could maybe do a couple of minutes of homework?" Perhaps I'm over-dramatizing a little, but the communication styles leave no doubt the source of the problem. I think many parents think that their kids are the problems when it's actually the other way around. Parents are the ones that tell their kids what to do. Parents should make the decisions--not the kids. One of Chua's many tenets is that Western parents treat their children under the assumption that kids are weak (at all cost avoiding hurting their child's feelings), while Chinese parents communicate with their child, under the assumption that their child is strong. It was very refreshing to read this, as it mirrors my teaching philosophy toward students. If you know a child is capable of something and yet they do less than what they're capable of, why would you ever communicate in a way that encourages that? While I agree with much of Chua's philosophy, I disagree with her style. I think it's one thing to have high standards (and communicate in a way that reinforces those standards), but it's another thing to use verbal abuse (insults, name calling, etc) to achieve that communication. There's a difference between being firm and being a bitch. I think the interesting piece of the book is the conclusion she draws. She wants to say that Chinese parenting is better than Western parenting. But because of the hyper-intense power struggles that she has with her youngest daughter, she stops short of making that conclusion. She spends the entire book criticizing American parents for letting their children make too many decisions, and the majority of the book focuses on the never-ending battles between her youngest daughter and herself and who gets to make the decision. Throughout the book, she fails to give in to her hard-headed daughter. At the end of the book, however, she ultimately gives in (despite her daughter's immense abilities). Because of this, she is unable to draw the conclusion that she wants to. As for how this will affect my parenting: Like Chua, I'd like to have extremely high standards. I'd like my children to be constantly aware when they are not meeting expectations (being extremely firm, but not a dick), but effusively praising when they do meet (or exceed) expectations. Here's how I apply Chua's conclusion, though: If you have a child like her oldest (who does everything you ask), use the high-expectations to have them realize their potential. If you have a child that is hard-headed in a cut-off-their-ear-to-spite-their-face kind of way (like her youngest), you have to adjust. What you have to adjust, I think, is not the high expectations, but rather the control of some of the decision-making. I say this as someone who was/is incredibly independent (and could not be told what to do as a child). If I were Chua, I would not have forced Lulu (the youngest daughter) to continue the violin (the majority of the book is about the battles they had over violin) when she became a teenager (which is actually what Chua did, though I think she pushed far too long). Once the kid becomes a teenager and really starts asserting their asshole-ness, you should trust that you've instilled a strong work-ethic, persistence, self-motivation, etc, but letting the kid choose how they realize those qualities. In the book, Chua pushes and pushes and pushes her daughter in insane ways to do violin, even though it is clearly more for Chua than Lulu. Let the kid choose the medium, but maintain the same standards for that new focus. (At the end, this is what Chua does, when Lulu chooses tennis.)

ümmihan çetin mmhncetin6f9a — how many times did i read this book? and then i gave a copy to my friend's little girls-so that they wouldn't have to wait until they were 18 to read it.

Pasat Catherine _atherine_asat — fav book of all time. favorite quote "that which yields is not always weak"

Judy Chen bjsolani — Yes! Zsadist is one of favorite people. vamp, whatever!

Renato Santos _ind_ider20 — Definitely a must read